Why do people act like being a vampire is so fucking great. You can’t eat garlic bread so what’s the point
last year this kid had some water damage on this math textbook and when he turned it in at the end of the year the teacher asked him how it had gotten it wet and he looked her straight in the eye and said “from my tears”
when girls press their whole body against you when they hug, it means they like you a lot. also, they’re measuring your body to determine how long it will take them to eat your flesh, a technique shared by boa constrictors
never forget that for voldemort’s name to rearrange to “je suis voldemort” in the french translations, they had to make his middle name ‘Elvis’
I CANT HANDLE THIS
are we just ignoring that wand is called a baguette in french?
the baguette chooses the wizard mr. potter
johnny depp is so confusing like sometimes he looks like this
and then later he looks like this
hE dOESN’T eVEn LOOK LiKE tHE SAme PERson!!!!?????
AND DON’T GET ME STARTED ON HIS VOICE, MAN
he’s an actor
actor fuck that shit he passed actor a long time ago hes a straight up shape shifter at this point.
I burned like 3/4 of my forearm on the oven while I was making chicken and my mom was like “honey put some butter on it it draws the heat out” so she was rubbing a stick of butter on my arm and my stepdad was like “what’s for dinner” as he walked in and saw her slathering my arm in butter and he just slowly backed away